“Trivia” as usual~
Written: 5/1-11, ≈00:33 – 01:40
But don’t let the amount of words scare you, enjoy the reading!
Dark void with a hint of light
The boy slowly opened his eyes. The dark red glow from the sky meets him and confuses him. Looking around he notices, and understands that this is not the world he is used to – but something completely different, but at the same time it feels strangely familiar. Maybe even a bit nostalgic? He shakes his head, pinches his cheek to check if he is dreaming. But the pain of the pinch felt scarily real. He no longer doubted that this was now his reality. The boy rises up from the ground where he was lying and observers the world he now was in. All that was seen was ruins of what looked like buildings, the dark red sky – Not twilight, but not night nor day. It was stuck in a mix, giving of a feeling of emptiness. But the boy felt that “emptiness” wasn’t quite the right word to use for it, and he found trouble finding a better one – all of the words kind of fit, but at the same time they did not. He then remembers the word “Void” and decides to use it. The sky, being stuck in the state it was, felt like it had given up on showing the normal colors of a sky. The ruins were spread all over.
The boy kept on walking in the void, not really knowing why he’s doing the effort of walking, nor where he is going. Aimlessly, endlessly, simply walking. He didn’t know how many days he has spent walking, as he cannot know how long a day is in this world. Nor were there any signs that a “day” has passed. In the beginning he found it odd how his stamina didn’t seem to run out, how he didn’t become hungry or how he simply could continue like he was. But all these oddities disappeared with time. Or well, so it felt to the boy. At times, he would stay, take a “break” and sit down on a few stone, to look at the ruins, that, happily enough for the boy wasn’t the same everywhere. Sometimes the ruins would be bigger, sometimes smaller, and sometimes you could see dead, rotten trees. He could find no traces of animals, as the ground too was dead. Nor did he find any water – not that the boy cared since he did not get thirsty.
One “day” the boy realizes why the world felt so familiar and nostalgic to him – it was how he was seeing his own world. The world most would subscribe as lively, full of different sounds, feelings, colors and people. Too him it was nothing more than a place where time goes, where people die and are born. He saw nothing more than void in it. People were selfish, needy, greedy, lazy and never cared. The boy was tired of it – That must be the reason he is here now. His wish to be left alone, to not bother anyone else was granted. But one thing bothered him; he did not know how he got to the world he was seeing. If it really was a dream, he should have been in the real world long time ago. He couldn’t let go of the thought “how”. The boy thinks for himself; he did still have his memories. During his thinking, feelings that had been asleep a long time started waking up. Surely he did not mind the red sky, or the ruins – he had no needs here, and no need to do anything. But, the boy wanted to see the blue sky. The one thing he actually liked in the real world was the sky. The endless blue, which sometimes was gray, sometimes had clouds floating around. At night it would turn dark, displaying the hundreds and hundreds of stars. He shakes his head and decides that thinking about such things was of no use – as he was stuck in the world of void.
Surely enough, the boy start questioning himself – “Did I really see the world with this kind of eyes? Was I truly such a person? One that did nothing but observe, taking in the ugly reality as it was?” He was becoming confused. Even more than the time he first woke up here. The questions kept piling up, and without finding answers, he didn’t know what to do. He even started to doubt his own existence – “Maybe I was here all along? Maybe my memories are fake ones that my mind created in order to keep me as ‘me’? Just… what am I?” It was getting worse as time went on. He was slowly but surely starting to lose his mind. To prevent it, as much as possible, he started to write down all he could remember from the real world. Even if they were to be fake memories – he decided that it would be better than nothing. It gave him a feeling that even a person like him, at least once existed somewhere, sometime. So, he wrote down all the things, even the bad things, things that he wished that he could have forgotten down. All the feelings he felt during the times, the emotions he had, what he had wished for soon filled the void world. This was him – this was all of the existence he could call himself. Even if he was alone in such a world, he still had this text. He soon enough notice that there is someone, that is not blood related to him that keeps showing up in his memory; He could not remember the person clearly. All that he could see was a silhouette, giving of the feeling of being splendid and strong. And seemingly it appeared to be a female.
She had been with him though all the hard times. He had shared many moments and emotions with her. They had cried together, laughed together. She was always there for him. So, even though she was an important and close person to him – why could he not remember her? He clenched his fist and threw it at the ground. Growing frustrated at himself, and the world, at his foolishness, and mistakes. Why had he not seen this when he was in the real world? Why do people always realize things too late? Just who was she?! He wanted to go back – he no longer desired this world of ruin and void. He realized that even if he had all these memories, he was alone. He was alone, and for the first time, he knew the feeling of being lonely.
He looks up at the sky – glowing dark red as always; slowly shedding a single tear. Despite knowing this, it was not like he could do anything about it, so he resumes his walking. Before he knew it, the words he had written all over had started to become a path. Without anything better to do, he follows it; it’s not like he would lose anything by doing so. In some time, he starts seeing a light. It’s was still faraway, but it shines so brightly. Even though the path could lead to another “world”, he did not mind. For the light gave him a feeling that the world of void was lacking, a feeling he could not place his finger on what it was. When he finally reaches the light, he hesitates to walk into it; not knowing what would happen. The boy takes a deep breath, slowly, but surely, walking in to the light, and feeling how his consciousness is fading…
The boy slowly opens his eyes, while feeling something wet on his cheek. Not being able to see clearly, he sees a silhouette, which matches the one in the void world. After blinking a few times, he can clearly see the girls face, who is leaning over him, sobbing. Doctors are rushing in, nurses being stressed. The boy; who is lying down on a hospital bed, gently takes the girls hand, squeezes it a little and smiles. The girl’s tears keeps falling down as the boy says: “I’m back.”